#1 Way To Avoid Assumptions
Approaching others from a place of curiosity can prevent conversations from turning into arguments.
This is because assumptions are *subjective* statements that you create based on your judgements, past experiences, or even attachment wounds from your childhood — they are not always rooted in reality.
When you catch your mind thinking the worst about someone, chances are your biased brain is taking over.
Your mind already has a lot to manage without having to create narratives about others.
Most people have a need for clarity and it’s not met by making guesses.
Try to genuinely understand others by asking questions in a way that *they” share their thoughts, motives, actions, etc.
For example, instead of, “She’s being really quiet. She just be mad at me, get curious: You’re quieter than usual tonight. Is everything ok?”-your.being
Man, where was this throughout my school years? I really wished people didn’t jump to conclusions assumptions about me based on race, perceived economic background, what they think you have or don’t have; or who they think I am connected to or not connected to. Too many times in my childhood and even recent events, people didn’t take the time to get to know me, and accept me for who I was (flaws and all.) Even today, there’s too many people out here exclude people because they are *different* instead of embracing someone’s uniqueness, quirks, personality as them.
Instead of calling someone crazy, delusional, weird; accept people for who they are and don’t try to change someone because it makes you more comfortable.
Instead of saying “that’s a weird black girl that likes cosplay and DBZ”
That’s a person who likes anime and DBZ, that’s her thing. I don’t have to know, understand or know why she likes what she likes, that’s who she is as a person.
I never fit in the box that people try to put me in at different periods of my life and I hope you do the same; which is continue to be yourself in a world that tries to push you to be the opposite. Here’s to staying true to ourselves and loving ourselves, and finding our people that love us for who we are.
Don’t forget who you were before the world told you how to be.
Here’s 5 Statements You Can Use To Clarify (Instead Of Assuming Or Judging) By Your.Being.
- Can you please help me understand what you meant when you said this____?
- I’m interpreting this to mean_____? Did I get that right?
- What I’m hearing is that you want to_____. Is that correct?
- Let me summarize what you said to make sure we are on the same page.
- Can you please explain it to me again? I’m still not clear on why you want to___-
It’s 2022 at the time of this writing, but by the time you read it, it will be 2024. I had to write a ton of content ahead of time to stay consistent despite what’s happening. 🔥🙌
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