But Loving Self-Awareness Can Set You Free
To make big changes, you have to be honest with yourself and what isn’t working and how you contribute to that dynamic.
According to the eqsschool, it’s not shame, blame or self-sabotage. It’s honest self reflection.
And when you see clearly that something isn’t working, the motivation grows to shift the behavior.
This is the hardest part. We make it hard because we wrap a lot of guilt and same into the act of looking at our own behavior. But loving self-awareness can set you free.
When you can look at a behavior and honestly admit that: a) you do engage in this behavior, b) you do have agency and can choose to make new or different choices, c) you’re not a bad person: you learned or adapted to these behaviors, d) you can see what it’s not actually meeting the need you want that behavior to meet, and e) you’re the only one who can actually make the change,
Then the motivation grows to take responsibility for your part in doing the work to shift into a behavior that does start meeting your needs in a way that is alignment with your values.
But so many of us are filled with guilt and shame about our patterns so we don’t want to look at them or take responsibility for our role within them. Because what if that means finding out that we’re actually defective in some way?
You’re not defective. But if you refuse to look at what’s in front of you and keep living your live passively without intention, then they’ll keep happening because they are deeply ingrained habits. You have to wake up and become conscious of what’s in front of you; you have to look at your patterns of behavior.
Until you do, you can’t fully utilize your agency, take back your power, and do the work to shift the behavior.
So there’s no shame in acknowledging that you gossip sometimes to try to connect with people. Or that you have a tendency to lose your temper easily, because that’s how you watched other people express their emotions and you just don’t know what else to do (yet.) Of that you people please because that’s how you feel safest. Or that you have a tendency to blame when you’re upset.
This is developing self-awareness; being able to see yourself where you are right now, without judgement.
It is only then that you can begin to catch those behaviors and make different choices that better meet your needs where you are at this stage of life.
It’s crazy, people tell me that my millions on Youtube, Soundcloud and my social media? It seemed like it came out of no where.
A long time ago, I asked myself what’s not working and how I am I contributing to that dynamic? I answered those questions in another article.
It’s 2022 at the time of this writing, but by the time you read it, it will be 2024. I had to write a ton of content ahead of time to stay consistent despite what’s happening. 🔥🙌
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