Did you fall off? Bounce Back

Alesha Peterson
7 min readJun 16, 2019
Found On https://awordwithyoupress.com/2014/07/30/tiffany-monique-skips-to-mylu-my-darling/

If you read enough of my posts, I fell off in college.

I asked a few opinions on this and many said it wasn’t my fault.

But still let’s stick with me falling off.

Let’s say for you?

You are in the zone and on cloud 9.

You cut out sweets.

You write in your dairy daily.

You wake up at 4am everyday.

You are on the top of your game in productivity.

But, all of a sudden, something happens that disrupts your momentum. Maybe an unexpected setback that messes with your mind. Or a trip that messes up your routines.

And now, you can’t do anything right. You wake up tired. You don’t feel like going to the gym. You don’t want to work. And you feel awful.

Mine was losing friends to suicide. Losing more friends after that in 2014. Losing 2 relatives the same year my friends in 2014. And being thrown away by a lot of peers when trying to get my mind off it. Losing a scholarship after explaining to the college (I was advised not to acknowledge their existence) that this stuff hurts. I also had a pain throughout school that they did not believe that turned out to be a tumor in 2016. I kept record of all of my doctor’s visits and was wondering why my body was off.

When I was in the hospital, I was no good to anyone and sick as hell. I advised legal council to keep my college at bay. They did ask about a few loans while I had surgery. Even my legal council was like how low is this school?

Real low. Cruel. My college never cared about me. I wish the 18 year old in me saw this.

I repeat this story to remind people my life isn’t always easy. (And I don’t take for granted my successes in entrepreneurship or entertainment) I remember not wanting to be at school at this point. And wondering why in the world I bothered with it in the first place. I was thrown away like trash and it didn’t feel good. Still doesn’t. After this I’m a little less trusting of people.

I fell off.

It messed with my pchyque. Am I a bad friend for not noticing more? I was strong for other people, why wasn’t I there for them in their hour or need? I maintained my workout because it was the thing that stuck with me. (Unaware of the tumor inside, yikes.)

Here’s a few reasons why I started my businesses.

1. Financial freedom: Stop trading your time for dollars, there’s only 24 hours in a day, make $ regardless of what your doing. Having control over my life. Not trusting people with my financial destiny. I trusted a scholarship and look what happened there. When you establish your own and don’t have to depend on anyone you have a lot of options. You take control of your own destiny.

Dan Lok said I rather be a rich “mf” than a poor “Mf”.

2. Creative freedom: Make more of global impact, help more people than you can ever do at work, Doing work you’re talented at, passionate about,

3. Time freedom: The ability to travel when I want how much as I want.

According to Tai, here’s how you can decide if a business is good or bad.

1. Passionate audience — It helps when people are excited about buying your products. A passionate audience = free engagement on social media.

2. Solves a real problem — The amount of money you'll make is proportionate to the difficulty of the problem you'll solve. Make sure there's already people paying to solve the problem — and also make sure your business idea does a better job at solving it.

3. Competitive niche — It's okay if your new business idea isn't really completely new. Zappos (selling shoes online) wasn't a new idea, but they still became successful by providing superior customer service.

According to Tim Han, here’s 4 ways you can bounce back.

The reason why this happens is because of something called the “what-the-hell” effect.

It’s one of or biggest threats to our success in embedding new habits.

The “what-the-hell” effect describes the cycle you feel when you indulge, regret what you’ve done, and then go back for more.

Your brain rationalizes your behavior by saying, “You already blew your goal of only having two cookies, so ... what the hell, you might as well eat the entire packet.”

The phrase was coined by dieting researchers, but the effect can apply to any setback or willpower challenge.

So how do you break the “what-the-hell” cycle and regain a measure of control over your goals? The most important thing is to recognize how you respond when you realize that you’ve let yourself down.

Do you automatically shift into self-criticism and beat yourself up over losing control? If so it will only most likely continue in to a never-ending downward spiral.

Here are 4 things I suggest you do instead:

1. Acknowledge, Accept and Forgive Yourself.

Beating yourself up is NOT the solution. Negative emotions about what you should have done and could have done serve you no purpose. These negative thoughts and emotions will not help you to make any progress in life. Leave the past in the past and focus on the future.

2. Get Back into Momentum By Taking Micro Steps.

If you have missed a couple of weeks or months of your good habits, don’t try too much too soon. Jumping back into an hour at the gym might be too much to hope for. If you normally run for a half an hour, commit to doing it for ten minutes. Start small and make it too easy to say yes. Start small and create the momentum to continue.

3. Remember Your WHY.

When you stop practising your habit you may forget why you committed to it in the first place. Connect back with your why. What are the benefits in practising this habit? How did you feel when you accomplished it? What were the rewards of this habit? If you want to feel motivated to get back on track, understand where the initial desire came from and make sure you feel the joy of already having mastered the habit.

4. Have Somebody Hold You Accountable.

This is the difference that makes all the difference, hence why all the elite athletes and high achievers have got coaches in their life to hold them accountable. If right now, however, you’ve got a strict budget, try joining an online community as that will boost your motivation because you’ll feel supported and accountable.

4 personal bounce back tips I used.

You don’t know for sure when things start to change.

Sometimes you can point to a moment, a word, a conversation or experience when you made a decision.

Took a step.

Revealed a truth, or became aware of one.

Awareness is the point of change, but you don’t always know when the awareness comes. It can grow slowly inside of you for years, decades. Then one day, you take the giant leap.

To everyone else, it seems sudden. Unexpected, unforeseen.

But it’s been growing inside of you for so long. It is the natural next step. It is your only possible move.

It is the blooming of a seed that was planted long ago.

It is growth.-Annie Mueller

  1. I got some distance. I got out of Indiana for a some time. I’m happy when I get booked for out of town acting gigs. I record music in Chicago. I’m borderline considering making another state my permanent home residence to call home .
  2. If you were a backstabber or trouble in my life I stay away from you. I had a childhood friend who tried to start trouble in my family reach out on at the end of 2018 on Facebook and I can’t. Part of success is the people who you surround yourself with. I’m a forgiving person but I have my limits. I wish them well but I stay away. Read I Have Different Folders Of People In My Mind.
  3. Kick the guts out of small goals. After accomplishing small goals, go back to the big.
  4. Start over. If you stopped reading a book, start at the beginning. Read one chapter a day. Same thing with workouts. Start with 10 minutes. Then after that habit for a week or two, go for 20. Than 30. And do on.

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Hello There! I’m Alesha! I’ve been involved in different businesses in several different capacities from being ceo, coo, co-founder, and more. I’ve learned so much from creating businesses, and I look forward to all the learning experiences I will have from starting new ventures. 2019 I’m excited to announce that I’m going to add more businesses to my portfolio. STAY TUNED! I’m going to introduce them sometime next year!

With one business I was involved with, we made it possible to install a little device with customized hardware and a SaaS solution implemented to the router, the business owner was able see live data about social media info collected.

With another company, we had professional internet marketing company that focus on digital marketing campaigns, services and jobs such as SEO, PPC, Online Reputation Management, and social media marketing.

With EYT, I oversaw day-to-day operations and keeping the CEO apprised of significant events;Yes I actually talk with my business partner on a daily basis. I created operations strategy and policies; Communicated strategy and policy to employees and interns; Fostering employee alignment with corporate goals; and overseeing human resource management. I also delegated tasks to my team.

With Bones’ Custom Guitar. We created custom guitars for musicians with imported wood. No one Bones’ guitar is the same.

The Wish Benefit Concert is a concert founded by Ayana Carter, Mel Sexton and Alesha Peterson. It’s privately held at Riley Hospital For Children.

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Alesha Peterson

Howdy! Entrepreneurship, fitness, music, acting, real estate, tequila & investing is sexy. Idea for an article? Input wanted! https://linktr.ee/aleshapeterson