How I Became A Full-Time Youtuber In 2022, Part 1
Like the SoundCloud one, this isn’t your obvious advice.
To continue on in what my Soundcloud article was saying. If you want to skip to the big bold part you can.
“Admit it, to a certain extent, you’ve spent too much of your time trying to shrink yourself, Trying to bend in half. Trying to become smaller, quieter. Less sensitive. Less opinionated. Less YOU. Because you didn’t want to be too much or push people away. You wanted to fit in. You wanted people to like you. You wanted to make a good impression. You wanted to be wanted. So you sacrificed yourself for the sake of making other people happy. And for years, you suffered. Let this be your wake up call. When you choose to pull back, say less, or retrain yourself magnificence in any way out of fear, out of logic, or just to survive you suffer. Be Unapologetically you. It will be ok. -Tab Calvitti.
“My mistakes where biting my tongue to keep the peace which had people thinking they could take advantage of and walk over me, helping and giving my all to a person/people who couldn’t do anything for me. Not loving myself enough and lowering my worth to please others. But now it’s fuck them. -Earnestine Purdue
Like the last time, I was trying to figure out if I was going to name this:
How I Got 100,000 views on my YouTube Channel
Or
How I Got My Foodies To Go To My YouTube Page! Part 1!
I decided to name this How I Became A Full-Time Youtuber In 2022, Part 1.
1. Your growth scares people who don’t want to change.
At the core, everyone wants to be loved and have a sense of belonging.
But I haven’t felt safe or really fit in no where for years.
I mentioned this in some other articles, but if you are reading this and feel that you absolutely don’t fit in anywhere, just maybe your path and calling is higher. Maybe the people around you isn’t your tribe.
I literally distanced myself from my religions, some schools and some organizations I once cared so much for because I realized they didn’t care about me. Breaking my back for people who wouldn’t break a sweat or break their back for me. I’ve taken on several new identities and it’s taking people still in my life time to square the old me with the new me (with some of the old still in me of course haha).
It was like an exchange of energy and space. Once I literally stopped caring for people that never cared about me, my numbers on many of my social media profiles skyrocketed.
I think wanting to be wanted for so long too many times was a mistake.
From grade school to college, I had friends, but too many times, I didn’t fit in. I didn’t act the ways others acted. I noticed that people supported others publicly in ways that they never supported me.
I didn’t get invites to Friendsgivings. I was the last person people thought of for Spring Break trips.
I noticed when going through hard things in recent years, very few people reached out. When going through hard things, I’ve gotten used to being isolated and dealing with it on my own like I always have. I do notice that people over the years supported other’s publicly in their grief more than mine.
Now, some of it might be that I do ask for space when a family member or friend passed away. I do not like to burden, and maybe some people don’t know what to say or do. So instead of saying the wrong thing, they stay away and keep on going with their lives. Maybe it’s the fact is that most people are too wrapped up in their own lives to recognize when someone they know is feeling isolated or unwanted. Maybe some of it is instead of reaching out, I personally pull back and clam up. Maybe it’s too many of my experiences that suggest to me that everytime I’m vulnerable with someone, it will be used against me so therefore I cannot rely on other people. So I don’t. Sad but true.
It’s a number of things, and I’m not saying it’s one thing over the other.
I notice to this day that I have to reach out to say Merry Christmas first before people reach out to me.
Being the only child growing up, thank goodness I was used to being on my own anyways.
But it was definitely noticed. I noticed this a lot in different periods of my life. I notice it now.
Now. I do not want anyone or anything that doesn’t want me.
My music is actually at 1 million streams now on Soundcloud, but I wanted to publish the start of it.
Are you wondering how I got 100,000s, just views on Youtube?
How my Soundcloud skyrocketed to 100,000 of streams?
How some of these articles got thousands of views and thousands of claps? Even the ones with just 200 claps is cool.
How my Spotify Grew 700,000 percent?
Youtube left me a note saying I grew by 2981 earlier this year%? Wild.
My Youtube(s) are popping now, but it started out at 100,000 first.
This is different advice.
For years. I wasn’t anyone’s first choice. I was (and to a certain extent) unwanted. I get invited to some weddings, but some family weddings I don’t. And it’s all love, and I’m ok with this (see my wedding article for details). I’m not in many inner circles for family and many friend circles I’ve ran in over the years. And I’ve made peace with it. In school, I didn’t gossip like they gossiped, I wasn’t willing to sink to their level. Fitting in with people is no longer a priority and never really was. I have thick skin, protective barrier around me, called Teflon. I related to what Josh Tam said also, some people don’t have the capacity or want to support you in the ways you want them to support you. I’ve mentioned this in so much of my body of work at this point. Sadly, just because you care about someone, doesn’t guarantee they will care for you in the same way.
This happens when you find safety and trust in what was once a tactic for survival. That tactic became a home base for you.
The reason for the creation of this protective barrier was two fold. First, you needed refuge from the pain of rejection. You convinced yourself that it is better not to need acceptance and love from others at all. If you don’t need something, it doesn’t hurt when you don’t get it. You convinced yourself you didn’t even WANT to be accepted or loved by others.
Damn straight.
You have to zig while others zag. If you don’t need something, it doesn’t hurt when you don’t get it. I do not force love or acceptance. If I click with a person, we click and we just vibe. As I stated above, I do not want anyone or anything that doesn’t want me.
With friendships, I’m flexible. Some people are situational. When that situation (job, school, etc) ends, so does the friendship. Some people I haven’t talked to in 10 years. If I call them right now, we can pick up right where we left off. Some people you know will be in your life forever, others are only seasonal.
It’s interesting, some people say I would be good for politics. Because I’m used to people destroying me. I’m used to not being invited. I’m used to people mistaking my kindness for weakness. I’m used to people overlooking me.
When you see it before, it doesn’t surprise you as much, and you know how to conduct yourself because you’ve seen it before. (Not to say you enjoy it, but you’re used to it).
So how did I get all these numbers without spending money on ads? Or spending any money at all on ANY SOCIAL MEDIA?
Being brave enough for being myself in a world that’s always tried to get me to be someone else, even if it cost me friendships and not fitting in.
And sometimes realizing that being on the outside looking in is a blessing in disguise. (Sometimes being in that clique or that possey would require you to compromise who you are to maintain an image/save face. So which side of the table do you want to be on and how much of a price are you willing to pay? At this point, that shit starts to be too complicated and I’ll stay by myself. Shit. And by all means, if you found your tribe, and found people that support you and your dreams, that’s great.)
Not forcing anything. Not sending thirst or clingy vibes. Not being that salesy person, trying to get people to buy something every time I see them. Not spamming people with my music. Spending more time cultivating an audience that’s interested in my content/products/music/etc. And no time inboxing friends and family, I love them, and if they are interested enough in what I’m doing, they will find me in their own timing.
And maybe it’s just my time to pop off.
****And at some point, I probably will spend some money on ads. I’ll let you know when I do this.
2. When I see a negative Youtube comment, I most of the time don’t respond. Hurt people like to attack others to make themselves feel better. It comes with the territory of Youtube.
Every once in a while though, I’ve managed to turn some of these people into fans.
Sources: (The copy and paste turned out big in this, my bad…)
Last minute 11/6/2022 update:
There’s a writer named Ossiana Tepfenhart that writes articles that relate to me so deeply.
In her article, she calls them lonely island failures. I call them the people everyone likes to f*** over.
Like she said in the article, she noticed that no one wanted to help her. Same with me. Throughout the years, since no one wanted to really help me like they freely helped others, it forced me to get creative and crafty, since at the core I’ll have that feeling of no one is going to help me but myself. While I never got jealous of anyone, I never understood why the help was freely given to others, but me not so much.
Like she’s saying. It’s impossible for me to ignore how many times I’ve been burnt. I had to end up cutting myself off from my schools, some organizations, a religion and mostly everyone I knew. To get the successes that are currently mine. I recommend everyone read that and the comments.
I do not have a mental health disorder like BPD.
But I’ve had to get good at compartmentalizing. And I do have a high pain tolerance. Getting a hit to the face is no problem. I’m used to people talking shit behind my back.
When you been through enough, you’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop, exactly.
And I do have a lot of skills and talents (many will remain unnamed), because I basically got the memo that I’m going to have my own back.
7 Signs Someone Is Threatened By You | by Ossiana Tepfenhart | Moments | Medium
Reading that was like reading the story of my life.
I realize why so many people have treated me like they have over the years. It’s because they feel/felt threatened by me. While I was just looking for friends and people to trust. I had no earthly idea that my skills/talents/whatever made people get intimidated by me. Had I realized how threated they were by my fitness, looks or whatever, things would have made a lot more sense. When I was looking for friendships I was mainly looking for safety and trust, I was not thinking that people were looking or seeing me as competition. Or sizing me up. In this world, this shouldn’t be the case, but you are judged by your looks by both men and women. It’s shallow, but it is what it is….
I have a group of articles that are similar that’s coming out in 2026. (Yeah I’ve written articles out that far into the future…because surgery Alesha wants to keep yall covered no matter what’s happening with me personally…)
It’s 2022!🔥🙌
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