These Conversations Make Me Want To Stay In The Woods Longer
I spend a lot of time in the woods. I sometimes wonder if I need to make it a permanent move.
The wifi is spotty.
I get texts days later.
But your connection is stronger.
My grandpa spent a lot of time in the woods months at a time because he hated people. I’m not to that point, yet. On November 4th, 2019 he would have been 98 if he was still living. I ate meat in his honor.
If you been following my articles, I clearly explain that I steer clear from toxic behavior and toxic people. There’s people lately that try to justify their behavior and think I’m being too hard on them. Jesus help me, because Lord knows I’ve given them more chances than the law allows, and they KEEP/KEPT DOING THE SAME BEHAVIOR. When s*** hits the fan and I say enough then people will come up with every excuse under the sun.
It amazes me how much some people will defend a toxic person and their behavior, but never took the time to see other sides of the story.
“Well you had opportunities that they didn’t have.”
Does it make it right for them to take out their frustrations, insecurities, and jealousy on me? No. I’m not a doormat. I’m surrounded by talented and nice looking people in both the entertainment and entrepreneurship industries. They have successes that I don’t have yet. It would do me NO good to backstab people. I don’t. They had the “so called” breaks and cuts. And they worked hard. There’s no reason to sabotage people.
Work and make your own opportunities, and quit hating on people. Use the successful as inspiration to find your way. Maybe if you spent more time developing your own gifts and talents, you will find your way. If you need help, please seek a therapist. I don’t want to be on the receiving end of 3 different personalities. Or 10 personalities.
I told my mom if she wanna hang out with my toxic childhood best friends, go right ahead. I hope they don’t backstab her and sell her down the river too badly. I don’t want to be apart of the conversation at all. And I’m not COMING to hangout with y’all. Geez!
“You should give her another chance”
I have given them multiple. I’m not perfect, so I give people as much or more chances that I’ve been given to redeem themselves. When I come home from auditions, I sit my clothes on my couch. I fall asleep with the plates and drinks on the table. I’m not perfect, those are my habits.
It’s easy for you to say that I should give them a 13th or 20th chance because you haven’t been on the receiving end of it. Example: Try having her spread a nasty rumor all over your job about you, then you get you fired, then put you in financial ruin. Then put you in a position where you can’t pay your bills and utilities on time. Let’s see how you feel about it when people don’t hear your side of the story, don’t consider the source or do some investigations to see if it’s really true, or if the person spreading the story is a jealous trouble maker. The only way some will truly understand where I’m coming from is if it happens to them.
“They had bad things happen to them”
Everyone has had someone pass away. (If you haven’t you are VERY LUCKY).
A couple of kids went to school with me watched their mom get murdered. They have always been respectful of others and always treated people the way they wanted to be treated.
I watched them roll my grandmother’s body out my house when she passed. I had a lot of friends pass away in my 20’s. Was I mean to you to any of you? Did I try to rain on your parade or slash your tires? So why do you think it’s ok to take it out on me? I was only try to be nice, just to find out that some people tried to turn friends and family against me. I’m not trying to sound harsh, but I’m annoyed with everyone always saying I should take the high road all time time, while the toxic person’s behavior wasn’t/isn’t addressed.
Speaking of that.
“Take the high road”
I have multiple times. I will not stick around to give people multiple chances to stab me in the back. My way of taking the high road is to wish them well, but stay 100s of miles away. I’ve had really cool things happen to me recently. I’ve been attending a lot of expos, conventions and conferences lately, with the FFA happening Halloween 2019 (October 31st, a week ago). I’ve crossed paths with some stellar people. I owe a lot of it to keeping toxic people out of my life. The Law Of Attraction states that in order to bring the positive in, you gotta dump the negative out. I’m very careful with who I surround myself with. If you have a history of being toxic, I can’t trust you. Once trust is broken, it doesn’t go back to its original dimensions. (You can build a foundation of trust over 20 years, and it can take 1 incident to destroy it). I can’t seem to get people in my life to understand this, so the only way I make it clear is to keep my distance. (People online understands me more than the people that’s known me for years.) Maybe New York ain’t far away enough.
“People Change”
My childhood best friend S that I still talk to said this to me about my backstabbing BFF that I no longer talk to. (They are current best friends forever, FYI). I love the way she defends her, because she never stood up for me like this throughout our friendship. She sided with the backstabber during engineer camp, so it’s no surprise she wouldn’t side with me in this instance, either.
Ok here’s the “change” apparently.
Guys and girls wait for it because it’s so exciting omg.
I ran into the backstabber’s spouse months ago. I volunteer a lot of different places. There’s chances that I can run into many people with different life paths and experiences.
He said “Alesha”
I never seen this person in my life. How in the f*** does he know me?
My wife, “the backstabber” said she knows you. She talks alot about you.
I said oh my s***. Of course he didn’t say backstabber, that was just me putting a word there. (And how can a guy so nice be married to a devil like that?)
She still been on my radar, and he gave it away that I’ve been a subject of conversation. I’m not supposed to know this insider information, but I do.
Bottom line: Some people do realize the error of their ways and truly do change. They are truly sorry and take steps to correct bad behavior. There’s a Quora comment that explains if someone actually deserves your forgiveness, and it’s perfect to a t.
And bless the person who wrote this.
Some however are still doing the same things, over and over and over! It’s been over 20 years, and you STILL TALKING. STILL trying to keep up. Still playing the same games, huh. I’m STILL a subject of conversation, all these years later.
Me & my childhood BBF agreed to disagree in this matter. Lol. I told her she can continue to hang out with her if you want, because I’m not going to make you choose between me or her (I never put people in the middle of that, or say you gotta pick me over them.).
But.
When you hang out with her, don’t invite me. Please leave me out. Drop me off at a State Park. I’ll build my own fire, cabin and hunt for my own food.
I’ll choose myself because no one else does (Thanks James Altucher).
Hince, I make sure to have a lot of security blankets in place. When people flake like Frosted Flakes, I’ll be good. (I’m writing an article about that, although I probably shouldn’t).
“You might need their help one day”
Thanks but no thanks. They caused so much toxicity in my life that I rather go to complete strangers or stay in a homeless shelter before I ask them for anything. Are they insane for suggesting this? Why in the world would I ask them to do anything? I wouldn’t trust them to take my diaper out to the trash can good. Lol. They would wait until I was sleeping then suffocate me with my own crap. (By the way I don’t use diapers, just an example. Confession: The diapers they put on me while in the hospital was comfy as hell, and wouldn’t be opposed to trying it out again. Make adult versions of Pampers and Huggies ALREADY!)
“You might befriend them again someday”
I said this with a quickness: You’re kidding me right? With friends like this, I don’t need enemies. Has anything I said meant anything to you?
This has always been the story of my life: I’m supposed to be the angel or saint, and keep letting toxic people like this back in my life because I can be such a great influence on them or I had opportunities that they apparently didnt have. No one ever considers my perspective. The s*** stops here. I’m not Mother Teresa. Life is too short to surround yourself with bad people. No one is putting that guilt trip on me.
Don’t call me an angel (Thanks Ariana, Miley and Lana). And I’m not gonna try out to be a saint either. I would get cut from that quicker than the sorority rush process.
If you read my Sometimes Being Alone Is The Upgrade article, I failed epically at having best friends in my childhood. Having best friends, and better friends in my 20’s made realize how a real best friend or friend in general is supposed to act and be. My dog is a better friend to me than most people. In my childhood I wasn’t hitting on jack s*** when it boiled down to it. One came awfully close, S, the one I still keep in touch with. She played both sides of the fence, and didn’t have any balls. If you’re not loyal behind your back and in front of your face then you not a true friend.
“You remember alot”
Yep. Which is why I get booked and have to memorize scripts quickly. (I would like a few weeks to prepare but life doesn’t work that way sometimes). I remember incidents that people wish I didn’t remember.
I’ve been around people who’s been through more trauma than the law allows. A lady I befriended recently told me some of the things she’s been through. She’s one of the most giving people that I know. You would never suspect it because she keeps it on the downlow, and doesn’t want people to feel sorry for her. Many I’ve come across are so nice, and gracious despite their circumstances. They would never treat me the way my grade school “best” friends would have. Everyone has been through something, it’s how they respond to it and how they choose to be.
What if?
I don’t spend hours plotting revenge on anyone that wronged me. I just stay 100 miles away and turn on airplane mode on my phone. I have changed my number multiple times.
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Hello There! I’m Alesha! I’ve been involved in different businesses in several different capacities from being ceo, coo, co-founder, and more. I’ve learned so much from creating businesses, and I look forward to all the learning experiences I will have from starting new ventures. 2019 I’m excited to announce that I’m going to add more businesses to my portfolio. STAY TUNED! I’m going to introduce them sometime next year!
With one business I was involved with, we made it possible to install a little device with customized hardware and a SaaS solution implemented to the router, the business owner was able see live data about social media info collected.
With another company, we had professional internet marketing company that focus on digital marketing campaigns, services and jobs such as SEO, PPC, Online Reputation Management, and social media marketing.
With EYT, I oversaw day-to-day operations and keeping the CEO apprised of significant events;Yes I actually talk with my business partner on a daily basis. I created operations strategy and policies; Communicated strategy and policy to employees and interns; Fostering employee alignment with corporate goals; and overseeing human resource management. I also delegated tasks to my team.
With Bones’ Custom Guitar. We created custom guitars for musicians with imported wood. No one Bones’ guitar is the same.
The Wish Benefit Concert is a concert founded by Ayana Carter, Mel Sexton and Alesha Peterson. It’s privately held at Riley Hospital For Children.
