What’s it like to often be mistaken for being much younger than you actually are, pt 2?

Alesha Peterson
6 min readApr 5, 2020

This published earlier because I accidentally set two to publish during the same date.

Oh coronavirus stir crazy problem.

This is supposed to be a hilarious follow up to another article. Since this published a week before it was supposed to, I’ll add yet more disrespectful twists that happened this year (in 2020.)

I signed up for a Quora account just to answer this question, because it happens to me all the time and I find it so annoying (AND VERY RUDE when people ask). I agree with many of the comments here, very flattering and very annoying. I’m not comfortable with how people assume, and how screwed some people’s perceptions are (yes that’s not a typo, I said screwed). Humanity has not stopped obsessing over how a person looks as opposed to who they really are.

Yes, I’m sure I will appreciate it when I’m older. I appreciate the way I look now and appreciate that I’m living.

Yes, I’m sure I will be 70 and look 20 (because A: My family ages really well and we have good genes. B: I have a fitness and skin care regime that I practice every single day C: I’m extremely proactive rather than reactive every single day when it comes to my skin).

Photo credit goes to Mathnasium.

No, I really don’t like hearing about “how youthful I look” or “how cute” I look every single day. It’s annoying. If I told you the stories, you would be reading all day. Ah maybe for another Quora post I’ll share stories.

I always notice that people ask me about my age when I go to public events, but they don’t ask other people and it drives me batty. I’m starting to tell people why I find it rude that they ask me how old I am and they just met me!

Then after they take a guess, in my experience, they usually start to ask if I have a boyfriend or try to hook me up, and I find lately I have to be more aggressive than I should be about that. The general rule is to not ask a lady her age, but because perception makes people think I’m a kid, some people think they can talk to me and treat me anyway. Then I have to put my foot down and be mean. :( I hate being that way but it’s the only way I’ve found to get people to stop asking.

I get carded all the time, and sometimes people and bouncers at bars are plain rude towards me. One time, they said we can’t have teenagers in the bar and we can’t lose our liquor license. UM EXCUSE ME, I usually say that with a few choice words that I can’t repeat here haha! I sometimes think they ask for my ID just to see how old I am (especially the guys, because a few times I was asked out on a date afterwards. I had to once again remind these guys that I go to bars to have a great time with friends, drink Tequila, not go out on a date and or get married! LOL.)

In acting and modeling, they like to see a youthful looking 20 something year old. I will admit that I have an major advantage there. I get cast in different projects quite a bit. When peers talk about wrinkles and how much more makeup they have to use, I scratch my head because I don’t have age lines, crows feet, or wrinkles.

In music, I performed with my band and one comment was made that I looked 14 by Preston. My family finds it funny, and my music friends find it funny but I don’t. One time, when I was signing up for lessons and the Rocky completed blasted my age out to people I didn’t know. I’m like lady don’t!!! I was so embarrassed. Just because you are impressed doesn’t mean that I want everyone and their mother to know. I don’t go around wearing my age as a badge of honor or rub it in everyone’s face how old I am. In my opinion, people make a big fuss out of it when I don’t. When I perform music on stage, I find I get stares when I don’t have a drink in my hand. It’s not a good idea to drink before performances, so after I get on stage and start singing, it’s clear that I’m a performer.

In business, while most of my experiences in creating start-ups and obtaining business partners are wonderful, sometimes people do underestimate me. There are times when people are rude towards me, and I don’t do business with them. I know several times I went to business meetings and the speaker ignored me but acknowledged everyone else. Then when they find out they made a mistake by me, they apologize and apologize and beg for my business. By this point I go elsewhere. Was it really worth losing money over being rude? It’s the best business lesson I could ever teach them.

I don’t ask for the red carpet, and I usually don’t tell people everything I know or have upfront for that reason. I want to see if they can treat me the way they want to be treated without me shaking money in their face.

I see aging differently than my peers, and I don’t feel the same pressures they do. All of my experiences are teaching me valuable lessons. 1. To not assume because perception a lot of times is not reality. 2. Don’t underestimate people. 3. Treat people the way you want to be treated. 4. When I’m older, and I come across another quote in quote “babyface” I will give them the respect that I’m not currently given.

P.S. Because I get annoyed or asked about my age every single day I am finding the silver lining in it. I am in the process of creating a “Fountain Of Youth” program for people that want to obtain their own “Fountain Of Youth.”

Disrespectful, Hilarious Twists:

  • They still card me but everyone else in the group is younger, a few are 10 years younger. One time a friend was 17 and didn’t get questioned, but I did. She laughed her butt off, because NOT only is she underage, SHE WAS UNDER 18 at the time.
  • I volunteered at an event, and they only targeted me (which a restaurant owner who was volunteering with me pulled me aside and suggested it was profiling, because they subconsciously think that clean cut black people don’t exist.) and At his bar he cards everyone despite what they look like. He mentioned that he never can be too sure and perceptions are a b****. When you start assuming things about people you are already on the wrong side of the coin.
  • I go to charity fundraisers and events where tickets cost $250 or more. Sometimes, not always they ignore me until they realize how much money I’ve given/who I am associated with/etc

Oh ma’am Ms Peterson I’m so so so sorry.

Lesson learned. How about we stop making assumptions about people, and treat people the way you want be treated?

  • I’m to the point where if they think I’m 21 or 18 f*** it. I really am at the stage where I try to keep myself out of unnecessary arguments. This coronavirus is keeping me away from people and while I don’t like being in one place all day, I don’t mind being away from peeps anyways.



Alesha Peterson

Howdy! Entrepreneurship, fitness, music, acting, real estate, tequila & investing is sexy. Idea for an article? Input wanted! https://linktr.ee/aleshapeterson