Why Successful People Hide From You

Alesha Peterson
21 min readMay 25, 2023

I’m about to confirm what many people suspect: Rich people really do hide from ordinary folks.

And when rich people hide… their knowledge hides with them.

It’s why you’ll mostly hear money advice from people who never earned a dime.

No wonder many “regular” people are clueless about getting wealthy!

There’s a reason why rich people hide. It’s not because they’re selfish.

The top 1% of earners in America contribute 33% of all charitable donations.

The average $2 million earner gives away 14% of their income. That’s a big chunk of earnings!

It’s also a much larger chunk than lower-earners donate, by the way.

(The average $500k earner donates just 8% of their income.)

When I was a kid, it killed me that no one reached out to show me how I could get rich.

I always wondered why rich people hid from people like me…

Until I got rich.

Then, the minute I opened my mouth about my success, haters started crawling out of the woodwork.

They said, “Oh he’s just showing off with his cars and his planes and his apartments.

Thing is, I’m not trying to impress you.

But I am trying to show you what’s possible.

How many times have you been told that rich people are bad? Or that rich people aren’t happier than you?

This is false information.

It’s information that programs you to make less money and achieve less than your potential.

I always say that you can’t have what you hate. You also can’t have what you can’t see.

And that’s why I made a promise.

I promised that if I ever made it — I would keep the curtains open. I want everyone to see what’s possible when they have the right information.

I had no role models on my way up. For 30 years I guessed my way to success.

Nowadays, I’m connected to the world’s richest and most successful people.

These are some of the most secretive people on the planet.

I learn from them every day.

Should I be the only one who benefits from their wisdom?

For too long, the people who need this information have been locked out of wealthy circles.

- Grant Cardone

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

1. Co-Signing is not a small favor, quit asking people to do that.

2. Those extra rooms you see in people houses are for visiting, not for you to live for free or long term.

3. Somebodys good job is not your meal ticket, stop getting mad when they don’t live up to the expectations of them taking care of you.

4. How someone spends the money they earned is not any of your concern nor is it ANY of your business. Stop telling them what they can and cannot afford to do with their money.

5. Who a person entertains privately/personally has nothing to do with your paycheck, so why burden yourself with the weight of caring.

6. People love people who make THEM happy, so if you feel like a person does more for their friend than you do as their family, then it’s time for you to reevaluate what you are bringing to their life as a family member.

7. If you don’t agree with the way a person is conducting their life … Guess what, it’s their life to live, you’ve got to worry about yourself.

8. Stop trying to force people into or to remain in your life. Some are only there for a reason or a season. Love the ones who love you back. -Kim Caudle

For starters, here’s my part 1.

Why I May Start Hiding Even More

I don’t trust easily. I have friends, but I also hide, it’s like the perfect balance of both worlds. I have my time with people, but when it’s time to go home, it’s time. I got the message at an early age that I can’t trust (and there’s a few here and there that are trustworthy). If I’m going to be by myself, I’m going to thrive.

  • I’ve had some recent successes that are blowing people out of the woodwork. My Youtubes, and the fact that I’m a sponsored athlete to state a few. All kinds of people have been crawling out of the woodwork, kissing my butt and acting like I did something godly. No….I believed in myself when you folks didn’t. When you were busy talking about me behind my back and attempting to turn friend circles against me, I was making a plan and slowly executing. I do not like butt kissers, I love people with genuine intentions and who can be themselves. I already keep a safe distance from most people already, if I have to distance myself more, cool. I do not trust easily, and my SHIT STILL SINKS. Like I mentioned in another article. I have to keep drawing the line at people calling me a Youtube God, saint and parting the red sea. I really have to stop the marriage proposals. I hate that type of attention shit! People, f***. Please, chill out! The mindsets I had to learn to get my breakthroughs are available on my instagram (aleshampeterson). I did not learn this from school.
  • I’ve had a lot of jealous acting people in my life over the years. For real. As always, success is the best revenge. But when some of these same people start reaching back out again? I rather them didn’t. Don’t say sorry for things you really meant. You meant what you said, now you’re trying to act like you were always supportive when you really wasn’t. Do better. If you have people in your life that’s doing something different than the norm? Instead of being critical, calling them delusional, and trying to cut them? And trying to turn people against this person? Mind your own business. Let people live their lives and you live yours. (When you been working at something for a while, and it finally pops off the fake side of some people come out. Instead of trying to figure out who’s real and fake you just stay away). Can you turn on people to opportunities without the fear of them getting ahead of you? If you hesitated for any reason, you need to do some deep soul work and figure out why that is. I really do a deep dive into the psychology behind that in my loner article.
  • Here’s the thing. I’m just starting out on my journey. I don’t consider myself to be an A list star yet (and find the Hollywood scene to be a biggo clique). I don’t have 100s of millions of views (yet). I just have my few million with my lil tribe. I’ve been called so many nice names that it’s like I’m a whole new person to these people. Now that my some of my visions that were just visions are now reality? It’s not so crazy and delusional. Friendly reminder. I do not care about being an A list star in the first place. Honestly I don’t care about that type of stuff. That’s an example I’m using for the sake of this article.
  • I’m no more resilient than you, the person reading this. I’ve just gotten good at bouncing back when people do shitty things to me. It’s easy once you do it over and over again.
  • I found out the hard way through life experience, that when it comes to most people, unless they can’t use you, they don’t want to be bothered. I’m finding the more success I come across, the less I want to be bothered with most folks. If you find me hanging on my own, I will be fine. Thanks in advance for your understanding. People to me ain’t really worth it anymore. Unless we are on the same wavelength or you just like my content, I hope they just go away. I’m just being honest. Literally in my funeral arrangements I got planned to put proud single girl. Did the damn thing despite what others thought. And even if that meant not fitting in or being understood by others. Here lies a hated b**** who loves Tequila shots from time to time. Help a girl out and pour a shot on my grave please. I am gonna be blunt here. I do not think a lot of my so called friends from school would care enough about me to show up to my damn wake. If they go silent during my successes and the hard things why in the hell would I think they would show up at that point? In life I’m literally done playing with folks. I’ve been saying this over a few articles, but the successes I’ve been experiencing? A big realization is they don’t care. And it’s on you to get you where you need to be. The game has changed for me, and I found a system that works for me. And my mindset is so solid that whatever I set out to do, I accomplish. (If your discipline is at this point, congratulations for being unstoppable.)

What I’m going to post on my Instagram, as soon as I break the news of my other breakthroughs. I’m just trying to figure out when to announce them. I haven’t decided if I want to do it during the summer, fall, winter, or even next year.

How I’m getting my breakthroughs (again)

Believe in yourself to the point of delusion.

You have to have blind faith, & believe in the things you can’t see. You gotta see your vision & the bigger picture when others don’t. Don’t let the opinions of others hold you back. I’ve been called all kinds of names throughout the years. Ignored it. And here I am.

Ironclad discipline.

Can you take relentless action day in & day out, even if you’re not seeing the results you want? Nobody makes me go to the gym, I make myself go.

Can you make yourself do things you don’t want to do, even if you don’t feel like it?

Even if you are under warm blankets, and those blankets just feel good. It’s raining and nasty outside. Do you keep hitting the snooze button? Or do you wake up on the first alarm?

Personal example. I have medical issues and I’m no good to anyone when I’m in that state. Getting sick everywhere, machines hooked up to me. Head pounding. Stabbing pains. Yada. It ain’t pretty. But my audience don’t want to hear that shit. I schedule out my content months in advance. (My goal is 5 years out. If I publicly say it the universe will grant it to me. With speeches lined up for years, potential sponsorship/PR/partnerships meetings, auditions, medical issues where I gotta go back from time to time, etc. I got to stay on top of the content. POINT BLANK.)

My friends and nurses are like you can slow down and you can take a break.

I’m like no….I want to see this through and I do. One week starts to become two, then a month. And I won’t allow myself to slack off like that.

The bottom line is I do not want my ideas, goals, going to the grave with me.

The next time you go to the cemetery. Think about all the goals, dreams and aspirations that went down into the ground with them.

It’s very unsatisfying and unfulfilling as a person to let your dreams, goals, die because you don’t have the discipline to follow through on them. Or go to the grave before they become reality. Or that you are so much into the status quo and keeping up with the Joneses, that you forgot who you were in the first damn place.

I mentioned this earlier. My mindset is so solid that whatever I set out to do, I accomplish. (If your discipline is at this point, congratulations for being unstoppable. Congrats for being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you everything you are not.)

But I’m also very clear on what I don’t want as well. I owe it all to discipline.

I do have quite a few non traditional reinforcements to keep my discipline and resilience in check.

I used to work 8–12 hours a day behind a bar because I lacked ONE critical factor to success… ❌

Most people think that I’ve always been “successful”, driving lambos… and that this sh*t was easy for me.

The truth is, I wasn’t different from anyone else…

I remember looking at how hard my bar manager was grinding and how much he was getting paid. It disturbed me to the core.

“This is going to be me at 40 if I don’t get out.”

I had a f*cking wake up call. 😤

The universe SLAPPED me in the face and told me I was meant for more.

My mindset shifted, my hunger amplified. ‼️

I CRAVED success more than I wanted to BREATHE.

I wanted to spread IMPACT more than I wanted COMFORT.

Most people would rather coast through life than fulfill their purpose. ❌❌

They’ve accepted a comfortable lifestyle over chasing their dreams.

👉🏽 Changing your situation is HARD, but you know what’s even harder?

Letting your purpose DIE.

CHASE after your dreams with INTENSITY.

Go out there, put in the work and never settle for an “average” life. 🔥-BMarkfit

Don’t talk about it. Just do it. The validation comes from you accomplishing your goals. Not talking what you want to do but never do it. How many people do you know say they gonna do things but never follow through? You don’t take them seriously right?

Face the hard truths.

I’m painfully self aware. When digging beneath the surface, sometimes you find out hard truths about yourself you don’t want to discover or realize. Instead of hiding these truths, I embraced them. Look in the mirror & face it instead of running from it.

FYI. It’s your responsibility to unlearn the behaviors that hinders your growth as a person. And learn behaviors and mindsets that will give you the energy and strength to start, finish and follow through on projects.

Ignore well intentioned advice. Be unstoppable.

Around age 25, I made a life plan. I know you got the same advice I did. Go to school, do this & do that. Following that well intentioned shitty advice made me unhappy and a f*** up. I don’t care about the status quo or keeping up an image. What you see is what you get. If I f*** up I will tell you. When standing up for something, I’m equally as raw. I hold nothing back & I WON’T BE STOPPED. Be unstoppable.

You become an unstoppable force when you realize you can do it alone. -thepositiveminds

When you find your purpose(s), & are in alignment. It will look like things are happening to you at ease to others.

Own your shortcomings.

Own up to your mistakes. And stop trying to be what you’re not.

So many people out here are interested in projecting an image to please other people. Stop that shit and learn how to be yourself. Too many people out here are watching others live their lives without living their own. They compare their reality to everyone’s social mask. I know it’s easier said than done, but stop this. Instead, take 100% accountability of what you do now.

Get the jealousy under control.

I can’t emphasize this one enough. If you don’t clap for others you will never get your turn. Hating on others won’t get you ahead, & gossiping about others won’t get you no where. You will reap what you sow. If you can’t be happy for others & their successes, get to the root cause of it. Friendly reminder: No one’s success is taking away from you.

Anytime someone tried to go out their way to cut me, turn others against me or lie on me, I assume it’s jealousy. Are you really that unhappy to the point where you gotta tear someone else down to feel better about yourself? Another one I noticed is when people feel like they can’t compete, they go silent. They say nothing, but you know they watching, just to watch you fail. Off record I’m not competing with anyone.

I don’t do and be “better” to spite the jealous folks. I’m successful despite. I figure eh, here’s someone who’s trying to project their insecurities on me. It’s up to them to find their purposes. They haven’t quite gotten the memo: if they spent less time hating and more time putting in the work they can get somewhere. It’s not my problem. I’m literally at a point that I don’t care what a jealous person does. I’m just aware. I’m also not gonna let anyone beat me into submission, let them change me into how they want me to be.

And here’s the thing. I found my purposes. And once that happens, everything flows. I don’t care about being liked by people, because I found my lanes!

8B. I can celebrate my friends’ and family members’ successes like it’s my own, because I’m not the jealous type.

Example time!

As more and more of my peeps get married, I’m happy for them, excited for them as if it were happening to me. As the unofficial single for life cousin and friend, I’m on cloud 9 for them. At the end of the day I just want my people to be happy.

HOWEVER. I know it’s not for me.

Anddddd I don’t project. Just because I’ve had some bad experiences, doesn’t mean it’s the same for everyone. I think we just need to stop comparing each other and let each other live our lives. I don’t need to understand why you are doing things the way you are doing it. You don’t need to understand why I do things the way I’m doing it. We can co-exist peacefully, yall.

What makes me a lil sad is when I see an engagement, and I know for a fact that some of my friends that passed wanted to get married and they don’t get the chance to experience it. We talked about it and it was one of their life goals. I’m sad that they don’t get to experience that. Literally I remember having the conversation with a handful of them before they died. Hey auntie Alesha is up for babysitting duty when you and the wife want to go out. Or when you and your husband want time to yourself. Or you just wanna do the dirty without kids walking into the room. (I even had the foresight back then to realize marriage not for me, but my friends were well on their way.)

And I hope for the people that do? That you experience a lifetime of love and happiness and forever to go on top of that.

Instead, I just held their hand in that coffin and told them that I still love them and I promise to honor their beautiful lives for the reminder of mine. And I’ll check in with their loved ones from time to time.

Insider Tip. Can you be happy for others even if things ain’t going so hot for you? It’s no one’s fault that bad things are happening to you, and as I pointed out in many of my articles. Hating on someone will make your situation worse. If you want to be married, find a happy couple to draw inspiration from, but don’t hate on someone who is married/engaged and your time hasn’t come yet. Comparison is the thief of joy! If you find that your friend OR co-worker got promoted, and you are a lil green, give them their congratulations, and WORK HARDER. BE BETTER. DO BETTER. Build skills and switch your strategies (or you can do what I did, start your own businesses if entrepreneurship is your thing). Don’t get in the business of cutting them down or spreading gossip on them. Someone got the acting gig or dancing gig over you? Clap for them until your time comes. You can never tell what someone has gone through to get where they are in life.

If you are a low point in your life, and in a rut. No matter what you do, you can’t seem to get your way out. It seems like everyone else is hitting their goals and milestones but you. You just feel like you’re behind and left behind. Please don’t take out your anger, and frustration on others and instead find someone to talk to. I’m far from perfect, but I do not have a jealous bone in my body when a friend or family member does something I’m not doing.

And ladies and gents, things went soo south for me in some years of school that I couldn’t believe it. I was like damn b**** you really fell off. I didn’t tell anyone. I just got the impression that people didn’t care, and felt ignored. I faced these hard days by myself and it prepared me for the future too.

Expect haters. Have thick skin. Expect to be lied on.

When you do big things, expect haters. Sadly some of the people I knew are my biggest haters. I’ve noticed the DMs & comments from people: You got a lot of haters I bet. Yup. What am I doing about it? Nothing. Let em hate. If they hating imma give em a reason.

Remember, they wouldn’t talk about you or hate on you if you were nothing. Embrace your supporters & let the haters hate.

Stop comparing yourself & stop wanting what others have so badly you forget the blessings in your life. I can be happy for others who are ahead of me because I appreciate my own gifts and talents. I got my lanes & they got theirs. They are gifted in areas I suck in? I can learn from them, not be intimidated.

Everybody has a superpower. The problem is, most focus on wanting somebody else’s so bad, they never take the time to discover their own.

When I started my career, I would watch the best, but not to see what they were doing so that I could try to do that too.

I watched them to see what they may be doing wrong, or what they may be missing out on.

I still do this today.

Everyone doesn’t have all the answers, and everyone doesn’t win the same way.

You can learn from those that have had success, but you shouldn’t aim to copy them.

Those that have left a mark on the world, that are revered as a legends, or have others wanting to actually listen to what they have to say, didn’t just copy or follow what someone else did, they led.

Led with originality, hard work, being different.

We need more leaders and less followers

So if you want others to follow you, then stop following others and start leading.

And, it starts with leading yourself.-Clinton Spark

In other words, stop focusing on everyone’s multiple gifts and talents, and spend more time finding your own. Can’t quite figure out how someone can be talented in multiple areas? Are you thinking I can’t do multiple things, how can they do it? That’s because you are focusing too much on someone else. Mind your business, and focus on your own gifts.

I show people from my school years what’s possible when I post a success. Anytime someone is resentful, I assume they don’t get it. Instead of putting in the work to find their own and get their own, it’s easier to hate. I’m operating in a different realm that they don’t get. I’m not gonna explain it, I’m just gonna keep flexing.

11. Master your mindset.

Validation should come from yourself first, not others.

12. Be yourself in a world that’s trying to make you be something you are not. I’m not living for others. I rather be hated for being who I am, instead of being loved for who I’m not.

13. Former altar girl got a hold of the bad side, and I love it (and apparently, a lot of yall love the shit too, broooo a million my Soundclouds combined is crazy AF). I rebelled against everything I knew growing up and the gamble is paying off. Stay tuned.

14. When you make decisions for your happiness, and start having a voice. Sometimes, expect to be hated. And sometimes when people can’t control you, they try to control how others see you. The misinformation and people believing the gossip on you may seem unfair, but stay above water, and trust at some point in time, the tables will turn.

15. I gotta be honest, my medical issues started early in life (like 15ish technically), so I’m being a tad bit more relentless and aggressive in getting my goals accomplished. I’m not complaining or feeling like I got a bad deck of cards. Hearing going out? I’m learning ASL. If I die on the operating room table? I’ll be good with what I accomplished. I recently said my cousins are my legacies, and I mean that. (There’s a lot of us lol).

16. When you do things different, expect to not fit in. I don’t fit in anywhere, and I’m used to it.

If you are interested in my articles that dive into this a lil bit more, let me know. The loner article is a great start.

P.S. Make sure you grow a pair before reading my content though. And learn to read it from objective lenses, and to not take everything personally. I’m not here to talk about girl scout cookies. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I rather be someone’s shot of tequila. I’m here to make you think. I’m here to disrupt. I’m here to open your eyes to different perspectives. If my content hits too close to home? If the shoe fits, wear it. If you take it too personally and it triggers you, maybe I’m not the right content creator for you.

You have to learn the difference between someone disrespecting you vs. feeling disrespected. Emotional ears hear from a place of offense. Sometimes it’s not what they said, it’s what YOU are triggered by. And unless you know your triggers, you’ll see everything as an attack.-Alchemichealing

Yes, I’m aware I shouldn’t say everything on my mind. And not everyone is going to agree with everything all the time. I’m not here to get you to see everything from my perspective all the time. But at the same time I’m not going to stop what I’m doing because a few people don’t like it. If it doesn’t resonate, I encourage them to go elsewhere, and find a content creator that does resonate.

17. Notice how people on the news have negative news stories, and it gets more hits and ratings than the positive stories. Humans thrive on negativity, no matter how bad it sounds. It’s the same theory behind why people will stop and look at an car accident, even though they claim they don’t want to look.

I actually did this with some of my content, and found that it helped me quite a bit. I have a lot of people wanting to work with me now, and I booked speaking gigs for years in the future, because I had the balls to take a gamble.

18. Being in solitude is better than being around the wrong folks. Like I said before. I’m done playing with most people.

Solitude itself isn’t painful. It’s wonderful. Spending time in Buddhist monasteries isn’t lonely. It’s peaceful.

Taking a vow of silence is not difficult.

I’ll tell you what caused the most loneliness and pain.

When my 1st friend passed away. Then the second from a overdose, and then the 3rd from suicide, and my so called friends at the time disappeared. The first friend passed in 2009, and the years following was especially brutal 2010 to now. Then when solid people started coming around, I really didn’t trust them and I put them through a hellish ringer to make sure I could. And some of it was as simple as keeping a secret. Many of them didn’t make it through that, because it got back to me.

What caused the most pain in my life is not solitude, taking a vow of silence, being in Bali by myself or being in monasteries. What’s painful is so called friends that said they would be there but disappeared. Talking shit behind my back when I was looking for people to trust. When people said they were friends, but they showed me way better than they could tell me that they wasn’t friends in the first place. When people in my religion at the time crossed the street when they saw me and the priest said my friends that passed was going to hell for suicide. I said that’s it. F*** that.

I’ve faced my hardest days in my solitude. It doesn’t surprise me when family and friends don’t respond (and sometimes I don’t respond to messages when I’m not feeling good. I have medical issues and I’m no good to anyone in that state, I gotta be honest, like I said above). I think some of what’s happened to me is triggering to them, and scary. And I can’t even get mad, because watching people pass away over the years is hard. I just assume, eh, they don’t want to be bothered. I’ll handle it like I always have.

Conclusion.

I determined in my mind a long time ago. Alesha. No excuses, you’re either going to find a way or not.

I’m more than happy to be a “hider.” Accomplishing my goals in my own way in my own timing.

I’m gonna just leave the world wondering how I did it.

It’s 2023!🔥🙌

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Alesha Peterson

Howdy! Entrepreneurship, fitness, music, acting, real estate, tequila & investing is sexy. Idea for an article? Input wanted! https://linktr.ee/aleshapeterson