And Happy Galentines and Valentine’s Day too!
I thought about putting Happy Foodietines Day. For all the people in love with food, because this accurately describes me to a fault.
It’s almost Monday.
As I write this on this Valentine’s Day 2021, another elephant of a topic came to my attention.
Yes, the older we get, we start to see more and more of our friends get married and have kids.
I’ve had a few people come to me and say
“My friends haven’t had as much time to hang out with me after they got married”
Look here’s the thing. YES IT WILL CHANGE.
When our friends and family get married, we are no longer the priority. Don’t dump them out because they don’t have as much time to spend with you. The friendship will evolve. Unofficially, as the wing lady for several friends, I’m #10 nowadays (and that is not to be taken personality, here’s why).
I don’t expect my friends who are married with children to go out with me like we did in the school days-THOSE DAYS ARE OVER. They don’t have the time anymore and have responsibilities. Every once in a while, I’ve had married friends slide into town and have those wild moments (provided if there’s a lot of planning and coordination). It’s not going to be text someone that same day and go out that same night.
It’s not going to be as carefree. If you are in school reading this, make sure that you make as many memories as you can. It might appear that it’s always going to be the same with your group, but it doesn’t always pan out the way we like.
Many times, the people we are friends with in our teens are not going to be same friends we have in our thirty’s. And the friends that we have in our thirty’s sometimes don’t make it to our 50’s.
Other times, we realize that they wasn’t your friends in the first place.
Instead of staying out until 4 am, it might be you staying at their home and drinking a glass of wine when their kids are in bed.
Or meeting up with them for a lunch or coffee break.
What I do personally?
I keep and love my married friends with kids! BE happy for them when they take those next steps. Support them like you been doing.
Also, add in friends who are single and have no kids just like you. Keep the old, add the new. In Indiana, my hometown, it appears that everyone is getting hitched and having kids, but it’s not true. There’s so many singles out here. Especially when I’m in NYC and LA, single-lifestyle is more of the norm. Go to areas where it’s more like-minded and you will find your people. Bet.
I’m happy for my friends’ happiness. I will like the couples photos, baby announcements, anniversaries and so on.
Romantic moments like this on the news is cute. I see those romance stories for other people. Me? Not so much. I’ve found happiness through other means. I also think being the only child growing up, I enjoy my solitude and peace. The most important relationship is the one with myself. As far as naggy busybodies people trying to hook me up? I just stay away, because even they don’t understand my higher purpose. I’ve found that some of the best relationships I had with guys when I wasn’t looking. And since I don’t want to be bothered in the first place, I’m not looking at all.
Some of us matured early because life showed us the worst side of the world at an early age.
Due to a tumor I had and seeing dozens of people from the ages of 19–35 pass away, it really drives in that life is precious. AND life is too short to be living miserably. Do things today, as tomorrow is not promised.
And the scary scary prospect of planning. Creepy. Picking out caskets is not something I like to think about.
For starters: On my tombstone, I would like the following
“Here lies a single b***** that lived how she wanted and not how the world wanted. If you feel generous, please pour a shot of Tequila down so I can have a sip. I’ll have some of the best Tequila up here waiting for ya when your time on Earth is up. Until we meet again, s****”
(I’ll post most of the quotes throughout my quotes series, by the way, I’m working on taking those off my Instagram but that’s taking a lot longer than I want).
Instead of showing up to a funeral/wake, especially if you haven’t seen me in years, please go to your favorite bar and drink a shot of Tequila or your favorite drink. Honor me that way. I don’t want to subject anyone to that level of pain. Going to dozens of funerals, wakes, cemeteries yearly for people in my age range is painful enough.
When my mom suggests that I should take Dijon, my beloved shih tzu for a walk through the cemetery, the hair on the back of my neck stands up. It’s not a happy place for me and a lot of my friends and family under the age of 30 is in there! Can we pick a nice park to go to instead? Or a nearby food joint?
Enough with the scary stuff.
Happy Foodietines. Valentines. Galentines.
I hope throughout this post, you know that you are valuable regardless of the relationships you are in.
If you happen to find that special someone? Great! If you want to ride the solo cruise, I’ll always have a seat aboard my ship (with life preservers) waiting for ya. Whatever you are doing today, I hope you’re happy and living the life that yo
The loves of my life? My food, nature, my dog, my outside cats, outside squirrels (If necessary, I’ll get the rabies shot like I’m traveling abroad) and any other doggie I see. I’ll kiss them on New Years and under the mistletoe for years to come. :D
Cheers. Have a great day!
P.S. Be the reason someone smiles today-or drinks. Whatever works.